Faith-building Bible studies and articles

• 29 Oct

  Virtues for Christ-Followers: Gentleness

  Gentleness, our eighth virtue in the list of fruits of the Spirit, is one that is less frequently focused on than the others. We find it referenced throughout Scripture in relation to both Jesus and His Father.

  We see God’s gentleness in His forgiveness of our sins, in the mercy He has bestowed upon us, in the patient long-suffering and steadfast faithfulness He has shown us. He is kind and gentle toward us. He is called “the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort.”¹

  Gentleness is manifested by actively showing goodness and kindness toward others and treating people in a gentle manner which shows concern and care for them. It is shown by being considerate, kind in our attitude, tender toward others, polite. A gentle person is mild-mannered, thoughtful, and friendly. Such a person doesn’t use force to get things done, but rather shows humble and genuine lovingkindness in their interactions and relationships with others.

  The gentleness of Jesus can be seen in situations such as His interaction with the woman at the well.² Jesus wasn’t condemning of her but treated her with love and respect. When we read the story of the woman caught in adultery, we see that Jesus didn’t condemn her either, but loved her and forgave her in gentleness.³ When Jesus saw Martha’s rudeness toward her sister Mary, He addressed the situation with gentleness.⁴

  There are issues where we should stand firm and be uncompromising as part of our convictions. But we can be gentle in our approach, even when taking a stance on a moral issue. If we want to become more like Jesus, we should be known for our gentleness. Jesus said: “Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.^”5

  If we seek to grow in gentleness, we may want to spend time meditating on and praising God for the gentleness and kindness He shows us daily. As we do, it can remind us that we too are to be gentle with others, as He is with us.

  The apostle Paul instructed, “Walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace^.”6 He also directed believers “to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people.”⁷

  It’s helpful to remember that God has been ever so gentle with each of us. He loves us. He sent His Son to die for us and gave us the gift of salvation. We didn’t have to earn it or labor for it; it was a gift He graciously bestowed upon us. May the gentleness of Jesus shine through us as we reflect Him and His love to others.

  The following articles provide helpful definitions and explanations of the fruit of gentleness in our lives and how to cultivate it in our interactions with others.

  Cultivating a Gentle Spirit

  Jesus is pictured in the Bible as a lamb,⁸ a mother hen,⁹ and a gentle, concerned shepherd.¹⁰ He said of Himself, “I am gentle and lowly in heart.”¹¹ He didn’t force anyone to believe in or follow Him. He showed compassion, and gently led people into His heavenly kingdom by His loving example. If you want to lead others to the Lord, follow His example. “To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps.”¹²

  We are called to be gentle and “kind to everyone” and “patient with difficult people.”¹³ If this sounds easier said than done, don’t worry. God can help each of us to be more like Jesus in this respect, too, if we let His Holy Spirit work through us.—Rafael Holding¹⁴

  Contagious Calm

  “Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything” (Philippians 4:5–6).

  The Greek word translated here as “gentleness” describes a temperament that’s seasoned and mature. It envisions an attitude fitting to the occasion, levelheaded and tempered. This gentleness is “evident to all.” Family members take note. Your friends sense a difference. Coworkers benefit from it.

  The gentle person is sober minded and clear thinking. The contagiously calm person is the one who reminds others, “God is in control.” Pursue this gentleness. The Lord is near—you are not alone. You may feel alone. You may think you’re alone. But there is never a moment in which you face life without help. God is near—be anxious for nothing!—Max Lucado¹⁵

  Practicing Gentleness

  What is gentleness? Based on the original Greek word used in the New Testament, the word gentleness literally means “strength under control.” The word was used to describe a wild stallion that had been tamed or broken. The tamed stallion still had as much power and energy as when it was wild, but it could now be controlled and made useful for its master...

  Gentleness is important for so many reasons. It defuses conflict. It disarms critics. It’s persuasive. It’s attractive. It communicates love.

  Most importantly, gentleness makes you more like Jesus. In Matthew 11:28–29, Jesus says, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls” (NIV).

  Do you feel weary and burdened today? Do you want to find rest and be at peace instead? Rest and peace come from being like Jesus—from being gentle.

  You can’t just walk out your door and force yourself to be gentle. Gentleness needs to be an “inside job.” It should be the fruit of God’s Spirit in you. Jesus is gentle, and when you walk alongside Him, you’ll learn to be gentle too.

  For more than 30 years now, I’ve prayed the same prayer almost every day: “Lord, help me to treat people the way Jesus would.” Why? Because I am not by nature a gentle person. So I have to let God produce gentleness in my life.

  Here are three simple ways for you to practice gentleness with God’s help this week:

  1. When somebody serves you, be understanding, not demanding. The next time you’re in a long line at a government office or coffee shop, be considerate—be understanding—of the person who eventually helps you.

  2. When somebody disagrees with you, be tender without surrender. You’ll never get your point across by being cross. You don’t have to back down from God’s truth, but you can treat people with gentleness and respect.

  3. When somebody disappoints you, be gentle, not judgmental. Ephesians 4:32 says it like this: “Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you” (MSG).

  As you walk alongside Jesus and put these things into practice every day, you’ll find yourself becoming gentler and more like Jesus.—Rick Warren¹⁶

  Choosing Gentleness

  In the Bible the word for “gentle” is sometimes translated as “meek.” Being meek is probably not something most people aspire to. In our way of thinking, meekness not only sounds like weakness; the two words mean virtually the same thing. But true gentleness resembles strength more than weakness.

  Gentle people have the potential to be rude or proud, but they have deliberately decided not to behave that way. They have intentionally chosen gentleness. That actually takes more strength than it does to treat others harshly. Unleashing our anger is usually easier than restraining ourselves. So meekness is hardly weakness. A decision not to retaliate may look like inaction, but it’s actually humility at work. What appears to be a lack of assertiveness is robust spiritual action.

  In his book Grace for the Moment, Max Lucado offers a pledge that we could all make our own: “Nothing is won by force. I choose to be gentle...”

  Those words convey how demanding it can be to choose gentleness. But we can do that because we have experienced the Lord’s tender love. We can trust that he will abundantly provide the strength we need to be gentle. His meekness is greater than our weakness.—Peter Hoytema¹⁷

  The Strength of Gentleness

  My dad was a big man. Even as an adult, I couldn’t put my hands around his forearm. His size and strength were intimidating. I remember him (as owner/operator of the local Dr Pepper Bottling Company) coming up to my high school, tipping the vending machine onto his back and moving it. Alone. He told me later he did it mostly as a warning to the boys. I guess it worked because I’ve had more than one tell me they were too scared of him to ever ask me out. They saw only strength, but not his gentleness.

  But in my mind and heart, my father was a gentle giant. Yes, he was authority. He was a protector, but he was a snuggler, and often a man of good humor. His massive hands embodied a gentleness that I find hard to describe…

  Jesus’ death on the cross is the epitome of gentleness. He could have called an angel army to pull Him from the cross! I picture those heavenly beings with their swords drawn, leaning forward, agonizing over the treatment Christ received. Just waiting for His order—that He never gave because of His profound love for you and me.

  But the same Son of God who cleared the temple and overturned the tables chose gentleness as the path to repair our broken relationship with His Father. And He is self-described as gentle in Matthew 11:28–29, “Learn from Me, because I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for yourselves.”…

  And it’s also seen in Colossians 3:12–13 (NIV), “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” What a powerful standard to live up to!—Kathy Shaull¹⁸

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  Gentleness is often seen in the world as a sign of weakness, but gentleness is actually power that is harnessed and used wisely and lovingly. When people behaving with gentleness stand up for the truth and godliness, they do so in a humble and gracious manner. Gentleness is to be applied when we witness and teach or explain our faith.

  “But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect” (1 Peter 3:15 NIV).

  “The Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness” (2 Timothy 2:24–25).

  It takes the power of the Holy Spirit to be gentle in our speech, especially when we face confrontation or differing opinions. At such times it’s easy to fly off the handle and speak angry, cruel, or disparaging words. But the fruit of gentleness helps us respond with tenderness toward others, and leads us to show lovingkindness, as the following quotes express.

  A believer should always be ready to tell others the good news of salvation in Jesus’ death and resurrection (1 Corinthians 15:2–4). … All Christians need to be prepared to give an answer or defense when someone asks them the reason for the hope that they have…

  To properly answer someone who asks about one’s faith, the Christian must use “gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience” (1 Peter 3:15). There’s no place for harshness or disrespect in a Christian’s life, especially as he represents Christ and gives an answer to explain his faith. Peter exhorts the believer to answer unbelievers gently, respectfully, and with the example of one’s life (cf. Colossians 4:6). Believers should reflect Christ’s teaching of gentleness and “speak the truth in love” (Ephesians 4:15 NLT).
  
  The command to “always be ready to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have” presupposes a faith that causes us to live out our hope in Christ visibly before others. When unbelievers see a Christian’s great hope in the face of persecution or suffering, they will naturally want to know the reason for that hope (Matthew 5:16). We need to be prepared to share the gospel in a way that is gentle and respectful.—Got Questions¹⁹

  Gentle Words

  It is interesting to think of the new era of love which Jesus opened. Of course there was gentleness in the world before He came. … Yet the world at large was full of cruelty. The rich oppressed the poor. The strong crushed the weak. Women were slaves and men were tyrants. There was no hand of love reached out to help the sick, the lame, the blind, the old, the deformed, the insane, nor any to care for the widow, the orphan, the homeless.

  Then Jesus came; and for three and thirty years He went about among men, doing kindly things. He had a gentle heart, and gentleness flowed out in His speech… There was never any uncertainty about the heartbeat in the words which fell from the lips of Jesus. They throbbed with sympathy and tenderness.

  The people knew always that Jesus was their friend. His life was full of rich helpfulness. No wrong or cruelty ever made Him ungentle. He scattered kindness wherever He moved. … As one might drop a handful of spices into the brackish sea, and therewith sweeten its waters, so these teachings of Jesus fell into the world’s unloving, unkindly life, and at once began to change it into gentleness. Wherever the gospel has gone these sayings of the great Teacher have been carried, and have fallen into people’s hearts, leaving there their blessings of gentleness.—J. R. Miller

  A Prayer for Gentleness

  Heavenly Father,

  We come before you with gratitude for all that you are, for all that you have given us, for your mercy and grace towards us, for your presence and faithfulness. You created us to reflect your image, and in doing so, to bring you glory. …

  Jesus, we see in you what is most needed in our own lives and in the world. You tell us to learn from you for you are gentle and humble in heart (Matthew 11:29). You modeled gentleness and humility while you lived here on earth. You have dealt gently with us in our sin. Help us to learn from you and follow your example.

  Gentleness is a soothing disposition and meekness from strength. We recognize that we need this, Jesus. So many people need a kind word, an act of compassion, a quiet voice of reason, a softly spoken encouragement, a tender touch. Help us, Jesus, to be the peacemakers. Help us to be mild-mannered. Help us to be careful with our responses and interactions with others. Help us to be those who bring calm to the storms raging in this world…

  Father, we ask that your Spirit would develop and grow gentleness within us. We know that we cannot bear fruit if we are not connected to you, so we cling to you, Jesus. By following closely in the steps of our Rabbi, we seek to emulate you … so that we may reflect your gentleness and in doing so bring you glory. Amen.—Ashley McCullough²⁰

  Food for Thought

  “Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near” (Philippians 4:5 NIV).

  “We must not only speak gently to our neighbour, but we must be filled, heart and soul, with gentleness.”—St. Francis de Sales

  “God has chosen you and made you his holy people. He loves you. So you should always clothe yourselves with mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Bear with each other, and forgive each other. If someone does wrong to you, forgive that person because the Lord forgave you” (Colossians 3:12–13 NCV).

  “Gentleness includes such enviable qualities as having strength under control, being calm and peaceful when surrounded by a heated atmosphere, emitting a soothing effect on those who may be angry or otherwise beside themselves, and possessing tact and gracious courtesy that causes others to retain their self-esteem and dignity.”―Charles R. Swindoll

  (For more on gentleness, see More Like Jesus: Gentleness. To be continued.)

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  Note

  Unless otherwise indicated, all scriptures are from the Holy Bible, English Standard Version, copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a division of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

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  ¹ 2 Corinthians 1:3.

  ² John 4:4–29.

  ³ John 8:1–11.

  ⁴ Luke 10:40–42.

  ⁵ Matthew 11:29.

  ⁶ Ephesians 4:1–3.

  ⁷ Titus 3:2.

  ⁸ John 1:29; Isaiah 53:7.

  ⁹ Luke 13:34.

  ¹⁰ John 10:14–15.

  ¹¹ Matthew 11:29.

  ¹² 1 Peter 2:21 NIV.

  ¹³ 2 Timothy 2:24 NLT.

  ¹⁴ “The Wonder of Gentleness” (adapted), Anchor, November 2018.

  ¹⁵ https://maxlucado.com/listen/let-your-gentleness-be-evident-to-all/

  ¹⁶ Rick Warren, God’s Power to Change Your Life (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2006).

  ¹⁷ https://todaydevotional.com/devotions/choosing-gentleness-2012-01-26

  ¹⁸ https://13prayers.com/strength-gentleness/

  ¹⁹ https://www.gotquestions.org/always-be-ready-to-give-an-answer.html

  ²⁰ https://www.ultimateoutcomes.org/gentleness-2/

   

  
• Oct 15 Virtues for Christ-Followers: Faithfulness
• Oct 1 Virtues for Christ-Followers: Goodness
• Sep 17 1 Corinthians: Chapter 4 (verses 15–21)
• Sep 3 Virtues for Christ-Followers: Kindness
• Aug 20 1 Corinthians: Chapter 4 (verses 6–14)
• Aug 6 Virtues for Christ-Followers: Patience
• Jul 23 1 Corinthians: Chapter 3 (verses 3:18–4:5)
• Jul 9 1 Corinthians: Chapter 3 (verses 10-17)
• Jun 25 1 Corinthians: Chapter 3 (verses 1-9)